Dad
has
his
own
important
role
to
play
before
the
baby
arrives.
And
you
can
help
him.
The
thrills:
We're
having
a
baby!
The
chills:
Will
I
be
a
good
parent?
The
mood
swings.
The
weight
gain.
The
self-doubts.
The
nesting
instinct.
There's
no
doubt
about
it:
Being
an
expectant
dad
is
hard
work.
His
and
hers
clocks
That's
right,
fathers-to-be
experience
the
same
roller-coaster
ride
of
emotions
as
expectant
mothers,
but
not
at
the
same
time.
Early
on,
when
your
hormones
have
launched
into
Mommy
Mode,
he
has
yet
to
fully
appreciate
that
you
are
really
pregnant.
The
baby,
so
much
a
part
of
you,
remains
an
abstract
notion
to
him
for
several
months.
Did
you
know
expectant
mothers
and
fathers
even
dream
differently?
Moms
tend
to
dream
of
newborn
babies,
while
dads
dream
of
older
children.
These
differences
are
normal.
Understanding
them
can
reduce
frustrations
and
strengthen
your
bond.
Talking
it
over
As
with
just
about
everything
in
a
relationship,
good
communication
is
vital.
While
moms'
concerns
rightfully
get
the
most
attention,
expectant
dads
face
their
own
worries.
The
initial
rush
of
excitement
often
is
followed
by
fear,
frustration,
and
confusion.
He'll
reflect
on
his
own
childhood.
He'll
fret
about
the
changes
in
your
marriage.
He'll
stew
about
family
finances.
He's
likely
to
keep
all
these
concerns
to
himself,
out
of
the
mistaken
belief
that
he's
protecting
you.
But
most
dads-to-be
are
just
waiting
to
be
asked
how
they're
doing.
So
set
aside
one
night
a
week
for
the
two
of
you.
Turn
off
the
television.
Order
a
pizza
or
make
some
popcorn.
Play
board
games
or
shuffle
a
deck
of
cards.
Or
put
together
your
baby's
crib.
Keep
the
mood
light
and
loving.
This
will
be
the
perfect
time
to
discuss
expectations.
The
more
decisions
you
can
make
together,
the
better.
Avoid
possible
disagreements
about
discipline
and
finances
by
talking
them
out
now.
Coach
of
team
baby
During
the
pregnancy,
moms
are
in
charge.
They
decide
the
extent
that
dads
are
involved.
Pretend
that
you
are
his
guide
through
this
strange,
wonderful,
scary
time
in
both
of
your
lives.
Most
dads
mean
well
and
truly
want
to
be
involved
in
the
pregnancy.
So
reassure
him.
Create
an
environment
in
your
house
that
rewards
communication.
Tell
your
partner
how
you're
feeling
and
what
you
need.
Does
back
pain
limit
how
many
household
chores
you
can
do?
Ask
for
his
help.
Would
you
like
him
to
paint
the
nursery?
Express
yourself.
It's
a
sign
of
strength,
not
weakness.
More
bonding
tips
It's
natural
for
expectant
moms
and
dads
to
turn
quiet
and
reflective
during
a
pregnancy.
You
have
much
on
your
minds.
The
key
is
to
resist
the
impulse
to
withdraw
too
much.
Write
each
other
letters,
sharing
your
hopes,
dreams,
and
fears.
Buy
a
book
on
pregnancy
or
parenting
and
read
it
together.
Go
shopping
together
for
baby
clothes.
Compile
a
list
of
the
qualities
in
each
other
you
most
admire,
then
read
them
to
each
other.
Plan
and
cook
nutritious
meals
together.
(Don't
forget
the
candles.)
Talk
to
your
doctor
about
healthy
activities
you
can
do
together,
like
walking
or
playing
Ping-Pong.
Reassure
each
other
as
often
as
possible
that
everything
is
going
to
be
all
right.
And
understand
that
both
of
you
will
occasionally
need
your
own
free
time.
Talking
about
such
normal
desires
can
help
prevent
misunderstandings.
The
best
news
You
both
want
the
same
thing:
a
healthy,
happy
baby.
Getting
dad
involved
early
in
the
pregnancy
can
help
accomplish
that
goal.
All
the
best
teams
have
coaches
with
different
skills.
There's
an
added
bonus:
Your
ability
to
communicate
now
will
provide
a
strong
foundation
for
when
the
difficult
but
satisfying
work
of
parenting
begins.
Attention
all
dads
Looking
for
ways
to
make
pregnancy
a
little
easier
on
your
wife?
Here
are
just
a
few
simple
ideas:
- Take
your
wife
out.
Pretend
it's
your
first
date.
- If
she
must
sacrifice
something
for
nine
months,
such
as
red
wine
for
dinner,
you
should
join
her.
- Tell
her
she's
beautiful.
Repeat.
- Turn
a
weekend
night
into
Family
Night.
Play
cards,
pop
popcorn,
rent
a
movie.
Then
keep
it
going
after
the
baby
arrives.
- Send
her
flowers
or
a
goofy
greeting
card.
She'll
appreciate
your
efforts
at
romance
now
more
than
when
you
first
dated.
- Buy
her
something
sexy
to
wear.
If
nothing
else,
she'll
laugh.
- Clean
the
bathrooms.
- Ask
yourself,
every
day:
What
one
thing
can
I
do
for
her
before
she
has
to
ask?
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